The First "Real" Post

OK, so I've been hesitating to post because I felt like I needed to write some sort of long personal history or biography on myself, to get the uninitiated up to speed. But, I realized that this bloc is mainly a personal journal for me, with a few trusted friends and family members looking on. So, I might as well jump in. There will be plenty of time for long mental meanderings.

Today I've been listening to a great sermon by Rob Bell called "The Flames of Heaven". I'm finding more and more that churches are using MP3s to get their sermons into the hands of the listening public. That's great for an iPod owner like myself. I feel a lot more introspective lately, and I feel like God is putting me through a period of spiritual and mental renewal. In short, I'm asking a bunch of questions about life, God, and reality. I believe in God, I believe in Jesus and his death and resurrection. I believe that we are commanded to love God with all our heart, and to love our neighbor as ourselves. But, beyond that, things get kind of gray. Especially when you've been raised in a Christian church and have gotten used to speaking that sweet, sugary dialect of "Christian-ese" your whole life. Example:

Church friend: Hey, John! How's it going? How have you been?

John: Well, I'm blessed, brother. God is good. How are you? (translation: life is sucking pretty bad right now, but I don't have the time or the inclination to tell you any details, because you probably don't really want to hear it anyway. But, it would be nice if we were'nt afraid to say how we really feel. How are you?)

Church friend: Great! The Lord has been faithful. Lately, I've been trying to step out in obedience and lay hold of the plans and purposes that God has for my life. I feel like God might be moving me to a new level, especially in the area of career. Praise God!! (translation: things are ok, I guess, but I've been totally confused about what the hell I'm supposed to be doing with my life. I'm sick of working the drive-thru at White Castle, because I hate their "food" and the whole place makes my clothes smell like pickled gym socks. I'd really like to talk to you about it, but I'm afraid that you'll judge me, or feed my some scripture verse that will do nothing but make me feel guilty. )

And so on. It's sounds great, but it's a sham. I have such a desire to live a real life, with real relationships, with people who aren't afraid to show who they really are. I think that's the kind of relationship God wants with us. Anyway, I'm trying to break down these "Christian-y" walls so that I can really love people the way God wants me to. Definitely a work in progress.